Face update - 1 year 10 months with braces

In march I will have had these braces for 2 years, and lately, my tolerance for them is wearing thin.

Its the little things that annoy me now, silly things which aren't a big deal. Its the way people treat me, and don't understand - I do explain why they're necessary to the surgery, but most of the time I get 'Oh when I had braces it was a piece of cake...they were off within 6 months...' I'm like, yes well this is different... but they don't get my frustration!

[In the convenience store]

Shop assistant - 'Do you have any ID for that?'

Me - 'Yes, I'm 21, and this is a scratch card...'

[At work on break]

Me - 'can I have a knife and fork, please?'

Manager - 'why? you're eating a sandwich.'

Me - 'I know but its easier on account of my braces..'

Manager - 'Lol, You're so weird, haven't you had those braces for like, forever?'

Me - '....forget it.'

[My local pub]

Me - 'Hey, I'll have half a cider please'

Bartender - 'Okay can I see some ID?'

Me - *Shows ID* 'I'm 21, and you went to school with me!!!'

Bartender - 'Oh well its cause of the braces...'

[Flirting with hot guy]

Hot guy - 'Erm...I really like you Sophie, but I think you're a little young for me, maybe if you were a little older..'

Me - 'I'm 21!!!'

Hot guy - 'Oh really? You know I wouldn't have guessed, you don't expect someone your age to still have braces!'

Me - 'I don't still have braces, I - ...never mind.'

I know I'm being excessive here, but I think I'm just bitter from being postponed.

END OF RANT - Back to braces!

With my hair straight you can really see the shape of my face.

My teeth alignment hasn't really changed much, I think thats why I'm getting so wound up - nothing is changing!

This, again, is my good side... I'm smiling, but you really can't tell

This is my bad side, which actually isn't much different from my good side, except I try to steer clear of photographs this side. Hate that downwards line by my mouth - makes me look sad I think.

I really want my appointment to come through soon! It's been over 6 weeks for sure! I called and they said I'm waiting cause I don't have a set orthodontist, as mines gone of to have a baby, so its just whoever is around and available for me.

The waiting game - a pre-op's worst nightmare

The Ortho-Store!

I've always suffered with ulcers, and having braces only exacerbated the problem! Here's what I do!

• For pain relief I use Anbesol - great numbing liquid, I find it works faster and longer than bonjela. You can get it in most drug stores here and US for about £1-4 depending on size. 

• As you all know, wax is the savoir when it comes to braces rubbing, but it might be cheap, but its not the best. I've even resorted to using chewing gum to cover my braces! Until Blogger Cathy told me about Gishy goo. Its a little more expensive than anything else, at £14, but its a crazy thing, it produces 2 substances which when rubbed together create a soft, but firm texture ( a bit like the stuff ortho dontists take moulds of teeth with) and it lasts a long long time. NOTE: for all you 'adults', like me, you might want to get the white colour - the green is very very green!

• Mouth guard - This I bought on a whim, but its the best investment by far. When looking for gishy goo, I found 'comfort covers' they are basically a light mouth guard used by people who perhaps play a brass instrument, or light activity. Its two plastic strips which you cut to size, they clip in to place around your braces, and VOILÀ, no more rubbing ANYWHERE on your mouth. I use them to sleep in and at just £5, they are amazing. Highly recommend. comes with a little case too!  

So there you have it! its only taken 2 years but I've finally found my 'brace survivor pack' 

I found out about these on www.orthostore.co.uk

go to 'Patient Comfort' and have a look. If they don't ship to your country/ area, look on Ebay and Amazon.

So glad I can share this with you guys! Natasha, I hope this helped! x

Blonde again! :)

 I get very irritated when things aren't changing. So I make my own changes.

Today, I:

-dyed my hair
-got another piercing
-booked my tattoo

Interesting note, I took these photos whilst I had my brace-mouth guard which I bought to sleep in (FYI totally works, best thing ever at protecting against ulcers!!) - I'm impressed that my lip doesn't look too enormous!

I'll post my tattoo when its done :)

Good night peeps!

Keeping Myself Entertained

I often wonder what my new face will look like.

I see everyone's before and afters and its so amazing to see how a person can look so much better and happier, but still keep the little expressions that make them, 'them' you know?

Me? I just want to be able to look people in the eyes when I talk to them without thinking 'are they looking at my jaw? Can they tell? They don't like me I just know it!' 

I want to take a decent photo without having to remember which side to avoid at which angle.

I think I'll be 'complete' once this is fixed. Like I can be the best person I can be.

Tongue, just pick a spot, then stay put!!!

Its been 3 weeks since I last had my braces tightened and oh my god what is wrong with them!?

I mentioned that my new orthodontist had removed my plastic chain runners and provided me with some lovely, discreet wire versions (which won't change colour when I eat curry!) 

So although I'm loving this in comparison, I think I've swapped my eye-sore for a whole-mouth-sore!
I'm prone to ulcers anyway - for no reason, but this is the worst ever - and its not even my usual 1cm+ ones! They've covered the sides of my tongue because I've ended up biting it with the brackets when trying to avoid hurting my lip. 

 This photo doesn't do it justice! Its dark, and angry looking, and its making my life hell!
I couldn't speak in class all week, and can't eat. I've plastered my teeth in wax as you can see but nothing helps! I'm out of Bonjela, Anbesol, and every other useless remedy I could think of.

I just wanna brush my teeth without having to hold my lip stretched out with my other hand!

Now, I know this is nothing compared to how I'll feel post-surgery, but at least that's a good reason to be in pain - this isn't! 

My jaw has also been locking at least 7 times a day - think this is because I've been clenching my teeth without realising it due to the discomfort of this damn ulcer - it has no idea what trouble it's causing!

All things must end... but not like this

For those of you who follow me, you know that I rarely include anything personal/ non-brace related details in my posts, but here's the exception - I had to get it out somewhere. Bare with me, I've been keeping this in for a while.

So, my boyfriend and I broke up.

We'd been together for 7 years. He was my world, my rock, my best damn friend.

He's in Finland as a foreign exchange student at the moment- as you can imagine  the distance is hard, but we got through it, or so I thought.  3 weeks ago he took a class trip to Russia, where I later found out he kissed a girl. 
I could forgive this - sure it hurt like hell, but it was one kiss with a person he's never going to meet again. This person then contacted me - telling me he 'said he wanted her.' 
I gave her the benefit of the doubt and told her 'maybe she didn't know he wasn't single...lets move on and leave it at that'. 

Her reply left me speechless. Her exact reply was: ''I wasn't interested in him before, but seeing as you want him so much, I'm gona go for it, think I can get him from you? ;P''
I told him this. He told me not to worry, told me he doesn't want her. I believed him.

I found out he'd booked another trip to Russia. I begged him not to meet her. He promised. He returned before I knew it - still promising he didn't meet her - but this time, telling me that he 'doesn't know if he wants me any more'. 
I was in pieces. Every night we'd talk on Skype, he would listen to me plea my case - I told him that he's back so soon, we can make this right, make this relationship better, because it was worth it, cause he was worth it! He dragged this out for 3 whole weeks, telling me 'he doesn't know what he wants' or 'we'll talk tomorrow' - but not before telling me that he still loves me every night.

Monday 19th - His Russian girl emails me print screens of their messages. 
He did see her in Russia. He rented a hotel room with her. He lay there all night telling her how he wishes he'd  met her sooner, called her his 'Russian Princess'. 
I called him again and again until he grew a pair and answered.

'I'm sorry you found out'....That's all I got.

7 years, destroyed, all because some manipulative bitch got a kick out of my misery, and because he was willing to throw it all away to the first girl who noticed him.

It's bizzare reading this back - I've not repeated this in so much detail to anyone. But although I've lost my boyfriend, and my best friend, the moment I hung up that phone, all the stomach churning stopped. I felt lighter, almost free. and despite the sadness this causes when I think about what will never happen now, he is not the guy I adored a few weeks ago. 

The deepest regret I think I'm feeling now, is that I feel so alone for my surgery - he was the one who pushed me to go for it when I was scared, and now I almost felt like screaming 'just wait! wait and see who I'll be after this!' I couldn't wait for him to come back from Finland and see the new me. I know that's wrong, and  I know I don't need someone like this. 

PHEW! There, I've made myself read this - made myself accept it.

Onwards and up! There's so many people out there who've gone through this - despite how trivial in the scheme of things, I really feel for anyone in a similar position, and I'm not gonna let it define my life :)

I'll be okay, I believe that now. 
Next appointment in 4 weeks! x x x

Bit of a Tight Fit!

As you know I had my appointment for adjustments and what-not on the 7th November.
Now, sure I expect my teeth to be sore, I even expect to not be able to eat particularly hard foods that week. But what I didn't expect is for it to have been 14 days later and still be struggling with a sandwich!!

Nice, sweet soft cupcake...ruined as my stupid teeth couldn't grind down those crispy sugary bits on top!

Still, I'd chose these overly-tight braces over the plastic chain-runners I had any day!

Hope everyone's having a more eventful week than I am!