Home sweet home...Now can I go back?

Afternoon! I've been rather MIA as I've had the most amazing week skiing in Morzine! It was my first time travelling alone, and it was really good for me with all the rediscovering of myself and that.

And now I'm gonna bombard you with photos cause I can't explain how awesome and beautiful it was!

I hadn't skiied in 6 years, but I was soon on the red slopes with a new great friend I met there - I was glad she was there alone too, we'd have both been pretty lonely otherwise (despite all the free drinks from the GORGEOUS guys on resort!) 


Back to real life! 

I have (dare I say it again) my evaluation pre-opp appointment on wednesday, where, once again they will decided if my teeth are ready for surgery in a month. but I'm crazy ill right now with a chest infection! and it better go away before then otherwise they won't see me!!

Hope everyone is well - Meagan your recovery is coming along so fast!!

Have a good day! 

*Raise's Glass* I'd like to thank all the bullies...

A post by blogger, Corrinne  got me thinking about how I used to feel about my face, and why I'm where I am today.

I used to be afraid to talk about my jaw, because if you talk about something, you give others permission to talk about it too- my family included. Kids at my school had enjoyed publicly humiliating me, a particularly bold class mate said my face was the shape of a foot, due to its asymmetry, and so kindly pointed this out to the whole class. Other significantly younger students have said my chin looked like a ..ahem, for use of a better word, penis! 

I never wanted to draw attention to my face, I think that's why I bite my nails - so that my hand is covering my mouth. I tried not to smile in class, and my eye contact, is STILL atrocious. I just felt like everyone was looking at it, everyone knew it looked weird. I couldn't bare to discuss this with my family because again, I was scared to have anyone else essentially agreeing with the bullies. 

Other than being referred to the Birmingham dental hospital for the TMJD (clicky, locking activity going on in my right jaw!) I hadn't addressed the cosmetic factor of my jaw, and always thought I'd never be considered an important enough case for surgery.

I have to thank one girl in particular, she found out her ex boyfriend liked me and she tagged me in a post on Facebook which said 'If I knew he liked it so much, I'd have grown a massive f**k-off chin like that.' If it wasn't for her harsh words, I wouldn't have had the courage to finally tell my parents how much this bothered me, and wouldn't have booked my first jaw consultation. Thanks again!

So here I am! - years away from the name calling of 2002-2007 and just 2 months away from having the courage to maintain eye contact with people because I'll have nothing to fear, but you know, even if I wasn't having this surgery, I wouldn't be afraid any more  You realise how childish people are as youths, and in the 'grown up world' it is (hopefully) very rare anyone would treat you that was just for looking slightly different.

Although it might not have began this way, I can happily say, that I'm having this surgery for ME and me alone, not to give them something prettier to look at ;)

'SOS' Brace Appointment

Hey so after being unable to get in at the emergency dentist over the weekend to get the wire which had slipped in to my gum cut down, I spent 2 days in agony. 

I finally managed to get in at the hospital to see a locum orthodontist at 12.20pm yesterday. I already had a hospital appointment at a different hospital at 10.15am to see a consultant about the tinitis in my ear.

They are miles apart so it was a push to make them both. I waited over 2 hours at the tinitis appointment and still hadn't been seen, so I had to leave and ask to be rescheduled. what a waste of time.

I made it to my SOS brace appointment just in time, and was seen by the same nice ortho/surgeon as last time. he changed my braces and also let me know that .....

THERE'S NO MORE ADJUSTMENTS TO MAKE!!!

I have a double appointment booked for the 16th!! 1.30pm for my impressions to be taken, then back at 4pm to get the results and decision from my surgeon!!! I'm so excited, its given me that little boost to stay positive, and I really hope its still ready for February like they said.

Happy New Year, Guys! :)

Just can't calm down

I don't know what's wrong with me.

I've become increasingly agitated all night. I've been lying on my bed since midnight and I think I'm subconsciously winding myself up. 
I keep getting tingles through my body, I can't breathe calmly and I've had a bunch of heart palpitations.
 

I'm fine - I'm not ill, I know its just bad anxiety, but I don't know why! 

I'm thinking of everything all at once, and of course surgery is more than a frequent visitor for my thoughts, but I'm so frustrated because its not done, its not now and its been almost 8 weeks and I still have no orthodontist!!!

My head is in my hands - why do we do that when we're stressed? I want to cry but I know its so irrational. I want to talk to my best friend but I don't want to burden him. I want to punch my ex in the face but I don't want to see him. 

Its like I'm really really thirsty and nothing is quenching it!

I'm going skiing in France - on my own, in less than 2 weeks, and now I'm thinking is this a bad idea. What if I get lost? what if I forget how to ski? What if I make no friends? What if the old friend I'm meeting doesn't meet me? I wanted to have had surgery by now - I'm not ready to get on with things until then - it doesn't feel worth it!

I'm clogging up all of your relevant brace information with this - but just typing this up, organising and rationalising my thoughts is making me feel better - having to think before I type is helping. I don't know why this is happening now - its Christmas for gods sake!

I guess everything just catches up to you sometimes

Muddy Walks on Christmas Eve

A/N - Meagan, hope you're feeling good! 

Happy Christmas Eve! 

Its such a shame we have no snow! 

I enjoyed a messy, muddy , wet walk in the local woods with my dogs.

They run crazzzy fast, and splash mud everywhere!

But  I love them :) 

Merry Christmas fellow brace bloggers!!

  

Face update - 1 year 10 months with braces

In march I will have had these braces for 2 years, and lately, my tolerance for them is wearing thin.

Its the little things that annoy me now, silly things which aren't a big deal. Its the way people treat me, and don't understand - I do explain why they're necessary to the surgery, but most of the time I get 'Oh when I had braces it was a piece of cake...they were off within 6 months...' I'm like, yes well this is different... but they don't get my frustration!

[In the convenience store]

Shop assistant - 'Do you have any ID for that?'

Me - 'Yes, I'm 21, and this is a scratch card...'

[At work on break]

Me - 'can I have a knife and fork, please?'

Manager - 'why? you're eating a sandwich.'

Me - 'I know but its easier on account of my braces..'

Manager - 'Lol, You're so weird, haven't you had those braces for like, forever?'

Me - '....forget it.'

[My local pub]

Me - 'Hey, I'll have half a cider please'

Bartender - 'Okay can I see some ID?'

Me - *Shows ID* 'I'm 21, and you went to school with me!!!'

Bartender - 'Oh well its cause of the braces...'

[Flirting with hot guy]

Hot guy - 'Erm...I really like you Sophie, but I think you're a little young for me, maybe if you were a little older..'

Me - 'I'm 21!!!'

Hot guy - 'Oh really? You know I wouldn't have guessed, you don't expect someone your age to still have braces!'

Me - 'I don't still have braces, I - ...never mind.'

I know I'm being excessive here, but I think I'm just bitter from being postponed.

END OF RANT - Back to braces!

With my hair straight you can really see the shape of my face.

My teeth alignment hasn't really changed much, I think thats why I'm getting so wound up - nothing is changing!

This, again, is my good side... I'm smiling, but you really can't tell

This is my bad side, which actually isn't much different from my good side, except I try to steer clear of photographs this side. Hate that downwards line by my mouth - makes me look sad I think.

I really want my appointment to come through soon! It's been over 6 weeks for sure! I called and they said I'm waiting cause I don't have a set orthodontist, as mines gone of to have a baby, so its just whoever is around and available for me.

The waiting game - a pre-op's worst nightmare

The Ortho-Store!

I've always suffered with ulcers, and having braces only exacerbated the problem! Here's what I do!

• For pain relief I use Anbesol - great numbing liquid, I find it works faster and longer than bonjela. You can get it in most drug stores here and US for about £1-4 depending on size. 

• As you all know, wax is the savoir when it comes to braces rubbing, but it might be cheap, but its not the best. I've even resorted to using chewing gum to cover my braces! Until Blogger Cathy told me about Gishy goo. Its a little more expensive than anything else, at £14, but its a crazy thing, it produces 2 substances which when rubbed together create a soft, but firm texture ( a bit like the stuff ortho dontists take moulds of teeth with) and it lasts a long long time. NOTE: for all you 'adults', like me, you might want to get the white colour - the green is very very green!

• Mouth guard - This I bought on a whim, but its the best investment by far. When looking for gishy goo, I found 'comfort covers' they are basically a light mouth guard used by people who perhaps play a brass instrument, or light activity. Its two plastic strips which you cut to size, they clip in to place around your braces, and VOILÀ, no more rubbing ANYWHERE on your mouth. I use them to sleep in and at just £5, they are amazing. Highly recommend. comes with a little case too!  

So there you have it! its only taken 2 years but I've finally found my 'brace survivor pack' 

I found out about these on www.orthostore.co.uk

go to 'Patient Comfort' and have a look. If they don't ship to your country/ area, look on Ebay and Amazon.

So glad I can share this with you guys! Natasha, I hope this helped! x